The (New) American Dream: Andrew Yang Wants You to Live in a Shipping Container

Remember the American Dream? A pastoral home in the suburbs with a lawn where your kids could run around with Spot, that mutt you rescued from the shelter? That dream is dead now. Sorry. 

In 2019, we were supposed to have flying cars and cures for every disease. Our standard of living was supposed to be the highest in human history.

Instead, I give you presidential candidate Andrew Yang’s plan to store you in a windowless shipping container, only to be dragged outside from Monday through Friday from 9 to 5 while complete do your mandated wage slavery for the federal government, and if you’re lucky earn a spare dollar or two to chip away at your credit card debt while your soul is sucked from your already-lifeless body.

Shipping containers look like this, for the record:

“I was in a shipping container apartment in Las Vegas that cost only $30,000 and was downright appealing. There are things we can do to make housing more affordable for many Americans,” Yang said on Twitter.

No shipping containers for our political class, though.

You know, the same people who caused that wage stagnation Yang is talking about by importing millions of third-world peasants who will work for less than you will, get paid in cash, duck taxes, and simultaneously collect benefits from our esteemed federal government? Those people live in high society. Those people (and their rich big business and lobbyist buddies) live in gated communities behind walls – which they tell you are evil – and sip champagne while dining on caviar.

Our new country’s gonna be great!

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